My Faith Story
Life Before Christ
I was blessed to grow up in a two-parent home in a small Midwest town, an idyllic childhood relative to many. In retrospect, I see both the hand of God and the enemy of my soul at work. I grew up in a church-attending home. It was not from a heart of repentance or having knowledge of God’s redemptive grace, rather it was from a compulsory duty because that is what “good” American families do.
How I Came to Know Christ
When I was 12 or 13, my family attended a film titled A Thief in the Night. It’s a dramatic portrayal of what events may be like here on earth at the time of the rapture. After seeing the film, I was terrified of being left behind so I prayed to receive Christ. Life with Christ was great! I loved church, church camps, youth group, Bible studies and learning scripture. I felt radically changed inside – alive with new life.
Through the Years
God has sustained me by His undeserved mercy, grace and love. He gave me strength to survive and grow spiritually during years of insecurity, anxiety and low self-confidence. With God I made it through the divorce of my first marriage and the deaths of three loved ones in seven years – the suicide of my youngest son, the suicide of my second husband and the death of my mother.
God was not and is not finished writing my story, which is HIS story. As a survivor of two suicides God has stirred in me a sensitivity for others wrestling with that hopeless feeling. God has opened doors for me to be present and share with others what it is like to be the one left behind, to dispel some of the lies that no one will care or that others will be better off if they were gone.
More than half my life is spent, I want to make whatever remains count for the glory of God. I have two scriptures that have become my life prayers. I regularly ask God to make me count my days, that I may gain a heart of wisdom. In Psalm 90:12 I am not promised tomorrow so I must make good use of today.
The other is Psalm 19:12-14. “Who can understand his errors? Cleanse me from secret faults. Keep back Your servant also from presumptuous sins; Let them not have dominion over me. Then I shall be blameless, and I shall be innocent of great transgression. Let the words of my mouth and the meditation of my heart be acceptable in Your sight, O Lord, my strength and my Redeemer.”
Writing This Blog
I have been journaling for twenty-five years. It is an outlet for me to process my thoughts, emotions and events of a day. Due to my life traumas and losses, I am passionate about seeing others obtain healing and overcoming life challenges.
My desire is that this blog be a tool used in the development of a deeper relationship with the ONE who created you, loves you and knows you, but should never take the place of feasting at the feet of Jesus through spending time in the Bible.
My writing may fluctuate from writing intimately to my heavenly Father with you the reader getting a close-up view of snippets of my life. That style is when I am writing to an audience of one. Other times I will be speaking directly to you – the readers.
My Prayer for You
Father God, I thank You for those reading this. They are Your unique creation. Lord, I know You have a wonderful plan for their life. You have a purpose and great destiny for all persons.
Father, meet all readers where they are and help them to trust You with all of their needs. Fill them with knowledge and wisdom as they read the Bible. Give them strength to refute enemy lies and give them power through the Holy Spirit to overcome obstacles to their faith.
You are the God who can make light shine through broken vessels. You are holy and just and Your grace is sufficient. It is in the name of Jesus I pray. Amen.